Most days I really don't understand Jonah. Why in the world he didn't just go to Nineveh when God clearly told him too, I will never comprehend. It's not hard buddy. Just do what you're told.

But then there are days like today where I feel exactly like Jonah. I want to pack up all my stuff, grab all the people I love most in life, and run from God.

He holds me so gently and whispers soft in my ear that He is sovereign. But I take my gaze off of my Savior and I see so much around me I just want to hold onto. I want to stay. I blubber through tears begging to stay.

Please Jesus. Oh please.

I don't want what's best. I want easy and comfort. I'm fine just where I am. I want my friends and my family. I want to speak english. I want here.

He pulls me in closer until we are eye to eye. His face up against mine. The tears begin to roll off my face onto His. His voice so calm, so confident.

I am your God. And you will be my people.

I begin to shake my head. Please let it not be true. It just can't be true.

I shut my eyes. Maybe if I don't see Him, this will all go away. Then I can stay.

His voice beckons.

Sweet child. My beloved.

I can't ignore the truth anymore. I can't hide. I slowly open my eyes, my vision blurred through tears. I glimpse His face, and fall into His arms.

My bones feel like jello and I lose all strength. My body sags into his as He wraps Himself around me.

I can't.

He quiets me. Softly consoling me. He speaks.

But I can.

And that was it. Therein was truth. I couldn't run anymore. I got my answer. I have my charge.